newly acquired glitz

changed the look.
the other one was too much. not me. not really.
Had fun messing around with the codes again.
Been slowly but surely acquiring web development skills. Netbios and stuff. quite handy, and quite adept.
There is always satisfaction in working the final form. the last step still gives me the most satisfaction. the creating, the thinking, the planning: that's all good—but the satisfaction unattainable. and there's always hunger for that pat on the back.

Listening to Dance Yrself Clean while typing this. Love the tune, and love the band. What a disappointment that i never got to see them live. I guess i'll have to wait for a reunion concert/tour in 20 years, when we'll all be old and rotting, missing teeth and fighting liver issues.

Past months have been weird, change of daily work and routines.

One familiar comforting exercise was working with Yo on her new album artwork. Yo drew everyday and every now and then characters, every time she felt like singing. We took in all these characters lined 'em up and created one big pattern, of which random crops were taken to makeup the covers. Hand-lettered all the text and then, worked with her and Roy on her video-launch thingie.
Yo's created a blog now with all the Hal Bent Aabalha Tghanneh behind the scenes goodies.
Always good to reminisce.

Today was the official 3akes Esser day.
From Ashrafieh to Hamra, ran into 4 casual drivers, aiming quite intently at driving against the traffic of streets notoriously and historically set as one-ways since my childhood. Ktir 3adeh.
They were,
a young hip classy college student in a 5series beamer with her equally aloof and chic girlfriend going up Monot street, and quite annoyed when all 4 cars, legally driving through, forced whatever was left of her conscience into submission;
a service-van chewed up like 5-day old chewing gum packed ad nauseam on the exit leading to the Ring from Riad el Solh;
a charlie taxi waiting anxiously and flickering as anxiously his high-beams in an attempt to communicate his anxiety and his rightful request to engage the way on Omar Daouk/John Kennedy st;
a small old white datsun sunny on the Makdessi-Roma st connection.

good times
I go now Coocs awaits…


she misses her brain

you know once upon a time,  i had a brain. and now, i lost it.


of things of great importance in my lonely small insignificant little life

This is grand!!!! i m not the only one who looks for inspiration in the bathroom!!! i am not alone! i am not alone! i m not alone!!!!—and i quote:
" Ji Lee is the creative director of Google Creative Labs--- When I have a creative block, I do a few different things:• Take long showers. Somehow I can think little differently while I’m in the shower. It washes away my old thoughts and I feel renewed."
Now my bathroom activity can get more interesting than a shower, but still.

why does bathroom time gimme juices?
tis the privacy perhaps? and the remoteness of it all?  humpf!

Burn down the disco
Hang the blessed DJ
Because the music that they constantly play
It says nothing to me about life
Hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ hang the DJ

and the vicar in the tutu just wants to live his life this way

The brain of mine is currently stalled. am not sure with what. i find myself slow, uninspired and completely unresourceful. could it be that i am:
a- out of wit
b- out of energy
c- out of creative juices
d- out of new
e- out of it

am definitely out of something. T says i need a break, so does Rooj. I know i need a break. but i also know that it's deeper than all of this. there is discontent and there is dissatisfaction—mostly aimed toward me and my performance.
or is it simply a standard block phase?
dunno, but i gotta feeling it's bigger than all of us (or me, coz who needs the drama?)

will look further within. the investigation continues.



or plain old fate?
romantic much?

ok, so was this a coincidence? or, meemee, did u know i called u a getaway art director?
plus i must say that u leaving messages as different accounts is quite perplexing. u comin from all sides :D

it's been a few days since my last post. and since then i worked on 2 wedding invites. 'tis the season, and the age. 'tis the age when, where i am from, and where i live, things tend to get monogamous and eternal. Lotsa weddings to account for. But when u think wedding, u think shopping for dresses; and when i think shopping for dresses, i think why the hell not go to me fashion designer friend and make meself a dress. which is what's happening. and i'm super excited!! from the sounds of it, it'll be the bomb.

from monogamy to boys. well for those who remember the "rassik bizarre" incident, yesterday it got better. i got in the dark room behind a local green door, a line that beat the hell of the now-acceptable "bizarre"; i got "you are a complete logo". silence. i'll let it sink in. can you feel it?  the thing is i dunno what i do to people, and what i inspire in boys, or men; but how the hell do i get lines like these? and the saddest part is they are saying it confidently with all seriousness. had they said that and laughed, it woulda been really cool; but they're not. they are impressed by their own prowess and that definitely puzzles the shit outta me. why do i keep getting the weirdos? Anyway, after that brief encounter with the third kind, i get a 22-year-old who wants to hold my hands to dance with me, after i kindly oblige him the first few times; i eventually try to avoid accepting the awkward 70's disco routine, he throws my way "so you're not used to this are you?" well, no, i'm not; i was born in 82, i grew up to Michael Jackson, dirty dancing, r&b grinding, and head banging! No disco boogying for me, ahtankyouverymush sir


Like me new face?

too white?
too light?
did i do it right

Am Back!

as ma2 noticed!! happy happy happy

Ok, after  a bit of work on meself, i feel better. stuck to the commandments, was hard, but i'm trying.
Promised Meemee  now estranged to the land of permanent cold nose that i will blog more often. Which will force me maybe to say things.

Anyway, today, self-centered-ness moment. Took a  pic of my belt for a friend. i took it real quick, with the office's EOS. and i like it. so am posting it. 
Meemee can you see all of me, when u c this? well u can imagine and place the golden shoes :D

Other than that, today after 9 months, one of the stupidest, most standard of all projects is reaching an end. Finally. When you think easy money, expect painstaking process.

Need new music.
Need new movies.
Been watching old ones lately. Saw Holiday with Cary Grant and Kathrine Hepburn. Not bad, pretty cool. although one's not clearly where it all came to end. I wanna be Kathrine, she's so stylish, smart, beautiful and funny. some day one day, right?


ooh ooh, an idea!

for this week, i shall abide by the following rules:
- there will be no gossiping
- there will be no bashing or talking ill of anyone (even of my maddening supplier, who will remain unnamed)
- there will be thinking thrice before talking
- there will be time before reacting

i will tame myself.
is this too much? i'm overdoing it...

Well, it's been a long long time

more than a year since my last post. over two years since a serious blog post.
I've been busy, true.
I've been swamped and distracted, true.
I've been lost too, true.
And now, i am tired, exhausted, and confused.
Lately my mind has been one big muddle of tangled thoughts and vague recollections, unclear logic and sloppy reasoning. I feel i am stumbling on the decisions, as if there is either something pushing me around, or i am overcome by everything that could come my way. I feel everything is so random.

I am at a point where my decisions could be clearer, i have the opportunity now to choose and pick, and i find my mind unable to supply my choices with the least bit of lucidity.

I cannot find the part of me that used to give me confidence to push through. i have lost the one thing i used to think gave me the assurance to voice out my opinions. i find myself requestioning my decisions, and double-guessing the hidden intentions of my unconscious.
I find my reactions unappropriate, my discussions undeserving, my positions unfitting.
And after all the bashing, i still have no pity for who i am, and no esteem for whom i'd become. And not to mention, no explanation for how i came to become what i am.

Now that i've said what i've said, i realize i have no hobbies anymore, no extra-curricular activities, no personal life, no interests, and no personal growth.
The difference between the ZOoz of 2008 and the ZOoz of 2010 is blindening.
I have to take action.

--and now enter the most random feeling and thought:
Facebook has replaced my thoughts and occupied with it socialite gossip trash.--
i shall leave that thought here, and come to ponder of it for the next week, and we'll all pick up then where my avalanche of randomness has left me.


i like editing.

so much fun. i got a chance to edit a 15 step video :D. so cool. was on wowow